Chapter 90: Couple Butchers: Deprived Emotions (Side Story)
Chapter 90
That\'s where he met Zhou Junwei.
Zhou Junwei was so different from the others. While everyone else was sent there to overcome internet addiction, gambling addiction, or violent behavior - having harmed their families and society to some degree - Zhou Junwei was the only one sent there to correct his sexual orientation. He seemed completely harmless.
In that era, people had a very low acceptance of homosexuality. So Zhou Junwei was isolated. Everyone was afraid of being liked by Zhou Junwei and becoming another homosexual.
Zhou Junwei was a very unlikable person, even the therapists didn\'t like him. Because the treatment on him yielded no results - no matter how much they electrocuted Zhou Junwei, there was no correction effect.
Zhang Ming was puzzled. If Zhou Junwei just said he wouldn\'t like men anymore, or showed disgust at those male photos, those people would stop electrocuting him. But Zhou Junwei refused to give in.
One day, Zhang Ming was assigned to clean the treatment room. He saw Zhou Junwei on the floor, his lips pale, his muscles still trembling even though the electrocution had stopped long ago. He was in great pain.
Zhang Ming couldn\'t help but ask, "Zhou Junwei, why don\'t you pretend you\'ve been cured?"
"Because my brain is free. I\'m free to love anyone, anything," Zhou Junwei gave a weak smile, "No one can deprive me of my right to love. I can\'t surrender to them."
Zhang Ming found Zhou Junwei interesting. He looked so thin and small, yet his willpower was so strong.
"This isn\'t surrendering, it\'s strategy. We pretend to be cured, so we can get out. We\'ll be labeled as \'normal people\'," Zhang Ming reminded him.
"And then what after we get out? Do we keep pretending? For how long? If we keep pretending forever, doesn\'t that mean we\'ve actually been cured by them? Are we still ourselves then?"
Zhang Ming was stunned by the series of questions. He wasn\'t that smart and never thought about such complex issues.
"Zhou Junwei, I don\'t know either. Sometimes I wonder if I\'m just pretending, or if I\'ve really been cured," Zhang Ming suddenly realized he hadn\'t touched a computer for many days. He felt sick just looking at computers.
Zhou Junwei recognized Zhang Ming. He was a notorious problem student in the school, rumored to have chased his father with a knife all over the street for money to go online. Zhou Junwei was a bit scared of him.
"Zhou Junwei, you dissected a rabbit in the classroom, you must be very brave. Why are you afraid of me?"
"I didn\'t dissect that rabbit. It was Chen Yuan\'an who did it. He was curious if a rabbit\'s internal organs looked the same as in the biology textbook. I didn\'t want him to be seen as a psychopath, so I took the blame. I love small animals, I wouldn\'t hurt them. Actually, I\'d like to work in a zoo. I think the animal world would be simpler. But my dad wouldn\'t agree. He wants me to become a doctor."
"Eh, rumors are terrifying. You must have heard rumors about me too. But they\'re also false. I chased my dad with a knife because I saw him bringing a woman home, having an affair in our house. I was furious, so I chased him with a knife. Sometimes I really wanted to kill him.
Later, my dad felt the truth would make him lose face, so he spread the rumor that I was chasing him for internet cafe money. I tried hard to clarify, but no one believed me, including my mom. They all thought I was a loser addicted to online games. Funny, isn\'t it?"
Zhang Ming continued, "My internet addiction is also fake. I didn\'t go to internet cafes to play games, I went to learn computer skills. I want to become a hacker when I grow up. But I can\'t get into college, so I can only learn by myself in internet cafes. I want to live in the virtual world in the future. The real world is too complicated and boring."
Zhou Junwei looked at Zhang Ming with surprise. He suddenly felt they were of the same kind. Because of their introverted personalities, everyone assumed the worst about them. When in fact, they had done nothing wrong.
"Zhou Junwei, be my friend. I don\'t seem to have any friends."
"Okay. Zhang Ming, you\'re my friend from now on. You\'re my only friend."
Zhang Ming was quite comfortable in this correction school. He didn\'t have internet addiction to begin with, and he was good at pretending. Whenever those psychologists treated him, he would vomit or show pain, so they would quickly end the treatment.
They were very satisfied with Zhang Ming\'s treatment results.
Zhou Junwei wasn\'t so lucky. The therapists had tried almost every method, but they still couldn\'t change Zhou Junwei\'s cognition. Zhou Junwei would still be interested in male photos, and he would still say he liked men.
Zhou Junwei didn\'t want to pretend he was cured. He wasn\'t sick, he didn\'t need to be cured.
"Looks like we need to bring out our trump card," Zhang Ming overheard those therapists say viciously, "No behavior is beyond correction once they enter our place."
Zhang Ming made a plan to escape from the correction school. He even drew a map and stole the principal\'s gold watch and all the cash in the drawer from the office. He planned to escape with Zhou Junwei that night.
But he was one step too late.
That night, Zhou Junwei was taken away. Zhang Ming didn\'t know what those people did to Zhou Junwei, and Zhou Junwei wouldn\'t say. Zhou Junwei had a new scar on his forehead, and from that day on, Zhou Junwei changed. He no longer liked men, but he didn\'t like women either. He wouldn\'t like anyone or anything.
Zhou Junwei was finally cured, but he seemed to have lost his emotions.
He remembered everything, remembered Zhang Ming was his friend, remembered his parents, even remembered he once loved Chen Yuan\'an, but he didn\'t know what love felt like. He couldn\'t experience emotions, he couldn\'t even recall emotions.
Later, Zhang Ming recovered and left the correction school. His parents didn\'t want to take care of him, so he went to do odd jobs, living day by day. But he never touched computers again, and forgot about his dream of becoming a hacker.
After drifting for a few years, he went to work at a zoo. He remembered Zhou Junwei liked animals, but now Zhou Junwei couldn\'t like anything anymore. Zhang Ming felt he could like animals on Zhou Junwei\'s behalf.
Shortly after Zhang Ming left, Zhou Junwei also recovered. His parents were relieved that their son had finally become normal, and much more likable than before. Zhou Junwei could face anything calmly and would say things that adults liked to hear. He had finally learned to pretend, as Zhang Ming had said.
He studied in a new school, got good grades, and was admitted to a decent university. At first, he followed his father\'s arrangement and chose clinical medicine as his major, but he would vomit uncontrollably at the sight of bloody scenes and couldn\'t complete the anatomy course.
So he chose to change his major. He didn\'t know what major he should study because he didn\'t like anything. But he thought of Zhang Ming, his only friend. He remembered Zhang Ming wanted to be a hacker, but Zhang Ming didn\'t like to touch computers anymore. Zhou Junwei thought, well, let\'s study computer science then.
Zhou Junwei couldn\'t like anything, but he still remembered he once liked animals. One day he went to the zoo to see animals, recalling the feelings he had for animals in his memory, and then he met Zhang Ming again.
Zhang Ming had changed a lot. He had become an animal trainer at the zoo, got along well with his colleagues, and looked nothing like the gloomy teenager he once was. Zhou Junwei thought it was good that Zhang Ming had become a normal person in everyone\'s eyes.
Zhang Ming was very happy to see him. Even though Zhang Ming now had many friends, he still cared about Zhou Junwei the most.
After reconnecting, Zhang Ming frequently sought him out. They would do many things together.
Later, Zhang Ming told him that he had fallen in love with him.
Zhou Junwei was perplexed; he didn\'t know what love felt like. He used to not care about whether he could feel emotions, but now he suddenly wanted to know what it felt like.
He began watching a lot of romantic movies, reading love stories, and would go out to the streets to observe couples on dates. He even started spying on couples during intimate moments. He desperately wanted to understand what love was.
But the more he observed, the more confused he became. He still couldn\'t grasp what love looked like - people\'s expressions, body language, accelerated heartbeats... all these things related to love were unstable.
Later, he finally found an answer. The human brain is the source of all emotions, so if he wanted to see what love looked like, he could only do so by observing people\'s brains.
So he designed a game. He set up dangerous situations to induce and amplify couples\' love, then observed what changes occurred in their brains.
At first, he recruited a large number of couples to participate in this game under the guise of a sociological experiment. He collected a lot of brain wave data from the couples. However, during the game, those couples were not serious at all. They didn\'t respect his game and instead engaged in various mockeries and jokes.
He decided he needed to enhance the immersive experience of this game.
He chose...
They loved each other so much, but during the game, in order to fight for the chance to survive, they attacked each other, venting years of resentment towards their partners. This wasn\'t the result he wanted, so he directly used the highest level of voltage he had set up to electrocute them to death.
Later, Zhou Junwei became curious about what same-sex love would look like.
Zhou Junwei originally wanted to find a gay male couple. But after observing for a long time, he found that most gay men didn\'t have fixed partners, and they seemed to care more about physical needs than emotional ones.
Later, on his way to the zoo, Zhou Junwei encountered a lesbian couple. They looked very much in love. But that was only how it appeared.
Zhang Yawen was willing to sacrifice herself for her partner, giving her the choice; Tian Xin, however, chose to electrocute her partner to death in order to seize the chance to survive.
It turned out that love could also be one-sided.
Just like how Zhang Ming felt about him.
Zhou Junwei stabbed Tian Xin to death with a knife. After killing them, Zhou Junwei stopped his frenzied actions. He felt that the love he had seen wasn\'t beautiful, and he didn\'t want to see any more. Perhaps, not being able to feel love wasn\'t such a regrettable thing after all.
Later, Chen Yuan\'an was getting married. He apologized to Zhou Junwei, saying he had hurt him when they were younger and hoped he could forgive him.
Zhou Junwei remembered that he had once liked Chen Yuan\'an.
He wanted to play that game again.
Zhang Ming loved him very much and was willing to do anything for him.
This time, their luck was very bad. The bodies were buried too shallow, and with the heavy rain washing over them, the police quickly discovered the corpses.
Zhou Junwei wasn\'t actually afraid of being caught by the police. When he saw Mu Mian at school again, he felt that he wanted to play that game one more time.
He had seen Mu Mian at school before; she was Teacher Shen\'s sister, an autistic person. He knew she was also someone with a deficient brain, and he thought she would be like him, unable to feel any emotions.
When he saw Mu Mian again, he realized he was wrong. She came to the school with Police Officer Fang. Their interactions reminded him of the love movies he had watched.
So even autistic people could have love.
He really wanted to see what Mu Mian\'s love would look like.
When he saw that Police Officer Fang was willing to exchange his own death for Mu Mian\'s life, he felt a bit envious of Mu Mian. Why could she have love?
At this moment, he heard Zhang Ming say to him: "Zhou Junwei, I would also die for you without hesitation."
Zhou Junwei remembered that he seemed to have love too, but he just couldn\'t feel it. If he could like anything, he thought, he would love Zhang Ming.
But he could never love anyone.
So, Zhang Ming was just a tool he used to kill people.
On the day he was sent to prison, Zhang Ming saw Zhou Junwei for the last time.
If he could, Zhang Ming would want to go back to the day before Zhou Junwei was taken away. He would take Zhou Junwei and escape from that Behavioral Correction School, go anywhere they wanted. Zhou Junwei could like anyone or anything.
At that time, Zhou Junwei would have liked Zhang Ming, and they would have walked hand in hand on the streets.